I hate it when an animal gets put down at my work. Today, one of my coworkers had to have her dog put to sleep due to age/physical issues. I had to help wrap this dog in trash bags and blankets. During that process, the dog's head was moved and I saw the one thing I really hate about putting dogs down...their eyes. The blank cloudy stare of this dog was enough to throw my entire day/mental state off. After prepping the dog for going to the crematory, i had to carry it to my coworker's boyfriend's car. Then I had to deal with my second most hated thing about this process...dealing with the family of the dog. I ended up getting really teary eyed and down after seeing them cry and feeling their sorrow. Of course I walked away quick, because I don't need to be seen in such a state. I went back to working and tried to let my music cure me.

Today was horrible. :(

Current Mood: drained

i just had a self realization. I used to be happy until I graduated high school. Now I just hate myself :)

i need to find a roommate by the end of december. if interested send me a msg. Jan-June is timeframe

Someone broke my passenger side window, ripped out my stereo, and ran...FUCKING AWESOME.

its pretty funny to think that both my sister and i have had our cars broken into and not my brother, who was arrested for breaking into cars.

Its so awesome that I've been pinching my wallet for the past two months because I'm broke, and now I have to replace the window. At least they didnt go into my glove compartment and steal the two flyers tickets(Christmas gift for my brother), a work dvd that is about dog behavior, and Open Season 2(I got it for free).

Now I have to leave and get ready for the midterm I'm taking at 6:40, FML

Current Mood: accomplished

I been sweating profusely outside and especially when in classrooms, but not at home. Fucking wierd. I better not be getting sick of being in public...But seriously, WTF!?

anyone going to be around tonight? I'm going to be extremely bored...someone should come hang out or something

i excrete acid to dissolve the shit you speak

I have been looking around lately for some good music to listen to. I recently stumbled upon Maylene and The Sons of Disaster. Theyre pretty damn good. Does anyone know of any music similar to theirs?

Been awake since 10 am tuesday. pulled an all nighter doing a programming assignment thats due by midnight tonight. as soon as im done that i have an art prooject to start and finish due thursday morning at 1130am.

also i dont think im going to the meet this thursday...for those that care. i will be hanging with a new/old friend and watching some shitty horror movies with a bunch o people...by new/old i mean i used to know him and played soccer with him and started chilling since i found he goes to rutgers.

im a zombie right now, about to get my 6th cup of coffee. fuck this shit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXAg-RSyvM4

^^^funny skit i thought id share with those that havent heard it before

bored and snagged this from badger

If you have 00-10 ... write [I'm a goody-goody]
If you have 11-20 ... write [I'm still a goody-goody]
If you have 21-30 ... write [I'm average]
If you have 31-40 ... write [I'm a bad kid]
If you have 41-50 ... write [I'm a very bad influence]
If you have 51-60 ... write [I'm a horrible person]
If you have 61-70 ... write [I should be in jail]
If you have 71-80 ... write [I should be dead]
If you have 81-90 ... write [I got a ticket to Hell]

HAVE YOU...

[x ] smoked
[x] consumed alcohol
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex
[x] kissed someone of the same sex
[x] had sex
[x] had someone in your room other than family
[x] watched porn
[ ] bought porn
[x] tried drugs (cocaine, morphine, percs, pot/hash, and opium...yea...i experimented a lot)

TOTAL SO FAR: 9

[x] taken painkillers
[x] taken someone else's prescription medicine
[x] lied to your parents
[x] lied to a friend
[x] snuck out of the house
[x] done something illegal
[x] felt hurt
[x] hurt someone
[x] wished someone to die
[ ] seen someone die

TOTAL SO FAR: 18

[x ] missed curfew
[x] stayed out all night
[x] eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself
[x] been to a therapist
[x] received a ticket
[ ] been to rehab
[x] dyed your hair
[x] been in an accident
[x] been to a club
[x] been to a bar

TOTAL SO FAR: 26

[x] been to a wild party
[ ] been to a Mardi Gras parade
[x] drank more than three alcoholic beverages in a night
[ ] had a spring break in Florida
[x] sniffed anything
[ ] wore black nail polish
[x] wore arm bands
[x] wore t-shirts with band names
[x] listened to rap (i still occasionally mix it up with rap)
[ ] owned a 50 Cent CD

TOTAL SO FAR: 32

[x] dressed gothic
[ ] dressed girly
[x] dressed punk
[x] dressed grunge
[x] stole something
[x] been too drunk to remember anything
[x] blacked out
[x] fainted
[x] had a crush on a neighbor (downstairs neighbor last year)

TOTAL SO FAR: 40

[x] had a crush on a friend
[x] been to a concert (korn, metallica twice, ozzfest, mudvayne, and killswitch engage)
[x] dry-humped someone
[x] been called a slut
[x] called someone a slut
[x] installed speakers in a car
[x] broken a mirror
[x] showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
[x] brushed your teeth with someone else's toothbrush

TOTAL SO FAR: 50

[x] considered Ludacris your favorite rapper
[x] seen an R-rated movie
[x] cruised the mall
[x] skipped school
[x] had surgery (polinidal cyst)
[x] had an injury (broke my nose twice and my arm, sprained my ankle various times, and messed up my arm 2 years ago)
[x] gone to court
[x] walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping (waitress forgot about us a couple times...fuck her)
[x] caught something on fire
[x] lied about your age

TOTAL SO FAR: 60

[x] owned/rented an apartment/house
[x] broke the law in the police's presence
[x] made out with someone who had a GF/BF (i think?...not positive)
[x] got in trouble with the police
[x] talked to a stranger
[x] hugged a stranger
[ ] kissed a stranger
[x] rode in the car with a stranger
[x] been harassed
[x] been verbally harassed

TOTAL SO FAR: 69

[x] met face-to-face with someone you met online
[x] stayed online for 5+ hours straight
[x] talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight
[x] watched TV for 5 hours straight
[x] been to a fair
[x] been called a bad influence
[x] drank and drove (bad habit of mine)
[x] prank-called someone
[x] laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex
[x] cheated on a test

TOTAL!: 79 [I should be dead]

this morning on my way to art, i was skateboarding with a huge portfolio hanging from my shoulder...the strap holding it on me snapped!!! it went under my board and sent me airborne. i got some cuts and scrapes on my arm and leg. it was very embaressing...on top of that i was late for class and couldnt concentrate at all. i hope the rest of my day goes well

i had to bring in a charcoal drawing that had been done within the past 50 years for discussion for my art class. The first site i found was amazing. The site of a charcoal artist Dion Raath. http://portrait-artwork.com/art_wildlife_01.htm . check out his work, its amazing

the puppies we've been handling at work came up positive for giardia. If i get that im gonna be pissed...

Current Mood: worried

anyone interested in buying 1-4 15 inch tires? since the wagon is done id figure id ask if anyone needed/wanted anything off it...

today was really shitty. i got woken up at 730 by my downstairs neighbor to move my car. so because i had class at 840,  i decided to get a meal to go from the dining hall on the campus of my class. At 930 i got a call from my dad saying my brother and cousin got arrested for breaking into cars. pretty much from that time until noon i was getting calls and texts about that situation between the sessions of being yelled at by my parents for not telling them about my brother being a thief. They didn't seem to understand that i thought he was over all that stupid crap because of the talks i had had with him about how dumb it is. So pretty much all day i couldn't focus on anything except putting all my anger into a clown i was drawing, which is unfinished, because im thinking of having a brutal murder scene in the background. So besides me finishing drawing a badass clown to contain my anger, Im left hoping for the best for my brother. He seems to think he is going to just get hit by some fine and have probation, i hope he is right. He did say he learned his lesson and is going to completely change his life, which i think is going to happen because of how serious he was. I wanted to yell at him about the scenario, but i know my parents/family got him good with scoldings.

One phrase to describe today: A brutally shitastic carnival ride.

Again...does anyone have a bandana they want to trade for one of my red ones?

Current Mood: stressed

I have 2 extra red bandanas. Does anyone have any other colored bandanas they'd like to trade me for a red one? I'm sick of having just red ones...

last night i had the strangest dream. i was in an elevator and a backyard every other moment. i was with family members grieving over the death of two family members(an aunt and an unknown) who were laying on stretchers in front of us. During our grieving, one at a time one of them would wake up and i would hit them over the head with a shovel or some sort of pole (it'd change) and they would fall back down dead. Every time they'd wake up, they would have this horrified/menacing look on their face. The dream ended when both got up and i hit my aunt in the face with a pole and chased the other person down a street, because he had somehow got away. It was the weirdest thing ever.

Current Mood: amused

Vegas was awesome. cant wait to go again next year. too bad i didnt have cash to gamble with...

i went to my first club there. that was pretty cool despite the fact that i dont really dance much.

i drank a lot of alcohol which was all free since my cousin was paying for everything, even plane tickets.

I also got to sing at a karaoke bar there...that was pretty amusing. i sang pardon me by incubus. I was pretty much shaking from the stage fright i have. i was told i sounded good, but i really dont think i did.

at one point i went next door to some bar and played guitar hero world tour on stage for free. was pretty cool. played drums for freak on a leash and hungry like the wolf, played guitar for linkin park's song on there, and sang beat it. because i was drunk i did freak on a leash and beat it on hard and the other two on expert. they gave me two free drinks for playing, my guess is because of the crowd drawn.

i spent a lot of the weekend at the side of a poker table watching/drinking and talking with my cousins.

Now that im home today i get to prepare for school tomorrow...should be "fun"

car=dead...im stuck in south jersey until i buy a new one. looking tomorrow.

Current Mood: annoyed

the room i was supposed to be in didn't happen. anyone need a roommate for FF? I'll pay my share.